so i have come to discover a very interesting and disturbing fact about myself; i am a hypocrite. its widely said that everyone is a hypocrite of some sort, though most folks are reluctant to admit it. it was a fairly eventful thing when i realized that i was. i didnt want to accept it.
it started out as a a rant that i was about to go off on people for when i have the realization that i am guilty of the same things that i accuse other people of. it has taken me a day to really accept and admit it. i hate it. i dont like it, and yet at the same time, i am quite reluctant to change it. so i cant very well condemn people for doing the same things that i do. it sucks, quite a bit. my pompous high horse seems a lot less high now.
discovering this fact has caused me to examine a lot more about myself and will continue to get me to keep examining some of my more obvious pet peeves.
it is a humbling thing to know that you are just as much of an asshole and hypocrite as everyone else. breaking that delusion is hard and harrowing and i must use it to better myself in the process. i only hope that i can, for i am quite lazy and it would be far easier for me to just write it off and go about my normal days. not that im claiming anymore to be better than anyone else, but i do think that things that are my opinions are well within my rights to express, whether they are of popular acknowledgement or not. i just need to make sure that i dont condemn others for doing the same thing, no matter how stupid they are.
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